Who Does She Think She Is?

Posts tagged ‘Rants’

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Who Am I?

Posted by Joni in General

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If you work with me at Big Law…

I’m the one who silently corrects your grammar and misspellings and tries not to laugh too hard when you, a partner, hand-write “forum non convenience” in an important memo.

I’m the one who remembers to search through an 80-page contract for references to a section of the contract that you’ve deleted (and flags them for you so you can decide what to do about them, since they no longer exist in that contract).

I’m the one who remembers to save that important document to my computer desktop “just in case,” and hands it back to you in an email when the system server goes down in flames one Saturday afternoon.

I’m the one who trolls the appellate web sites for opinions that might be relevant to cases you are working on, hoping that one may be the smoking gun you need to win your case.

I’m the one who keeps abreast of new technology so when you come running up to me with seconds to spare, I can calmly take care of your last-minute e-filing without having a nervous breakdown. (I’ll leave that for YOU to do.)

I’m the one who keeps the copier full of paper. frees it from jams, and clears out your user ID and matter number (so others don’t come along and rack up copy costs on your client’s dime).

I’m the one who stays a few minutes past quitting time to make sure your project is completed, printed and delivered to your office when a clock watcher might have just emailed it back to you incomplete about 10 minutes before quitting time.

I’m the one who keeps silent when our very generous support staff bonus (which I’ve been the beneficiary of for over 18 years) was drastically cut last year, yet partner bonuses continued as before.

I’m the one who tries not to notice when summer associates and first year lawyers look at secretaries like we are second rate citizens. Yet we are the first ones you run to when the coffee machine, the copier, or the ice machine breaks down or you need reservations to a restaurant yesterday.

I’m the one who never forgets what the firm has done for me when it didn’t have to, when I lost my car in Tropical Storm Allison in 2001, or when my husband became catastrophically injured in 2003.

Yep, that’s me. You got a problem with that?

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