Who Does She Think She Is?

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I’ll Tumble For Ya

Posted by Joni in General

It was not going to be your typical Monday. In getting ready for work Monday morning, I was mailing my old laptop (the Armada) to the guy who bought it from me on e-Bay. It was in its Compaq laptop case, nicely padded and loaded to the gills with the accessories.

I had the strap packed inside the zipper part of the case because I was just going to shove the whole thing into a box, right? So I’m leaving for work and I have my purse (which also weighs a TON) slung over my shoulder, my keys, the laptop case, which I’m holding by its handle, like a suitcase, and my ever-present Thermos of coffee. It dawns on me (braincell that I am) that I cannot possibly make it down the stairs with the laptop, the purse, the keys and coffee AND hold onto the rail. So I decide to hook the shoulder strap to the laptop so I can put that over my shoulder too. Brilliant planning, eh?

So there I go, laptop case and purse over one shoulder, coffee mug in left hand, keys in right hand, holding onto the rail with right hand. I take one step and that’s when it all comes apart. The next thing I know, I am literally cartwheeling down the stairs, I feel myself tumbling, everything is upside down, I am frantically grabbing for the rail, I vaguely think that I am feeling some pain and hope to hell I don’t hit my head on the concrete at the bottom of the stairs. Then suddenly, I stop. I am caught by the laptop case and purse which have become tangled and wedged in between the stair railings. Some yard man who was in the next yard comes running over. I’m kinda hung there, in an upright position, but unable to move. He then comes halfway up the stairs, where I am, and takes my purse and laptop case and asks me again if I am okay. By this time, of course, I am crying, more from shock and embarrassment than anything else.

I see that one shoe is missing, and a toe is bleeding. He also says I have blood on my face. I hobble down to the bottom of the stairs where my other shoe and the Thermos are. You should see that Thermos. It took a shot, it looks like it was run over by a car! When I assure him I am okay and that I am just going to sit on the steps and compose myself and call my office, he goes back to what he’s doing.

I sit there for a few minutes and take stock of my injuries. I am strangely comforted by the fact that I feel pain. Unlike Robert. So that was in the back of my mind. My left ankle is really hurting, but after a few minutes, and after finishing my coffee, I decide to hobble over to my car and try to head to work. This is one of those rare occasions when I despise my car for being small and low to the ground. And for being a stick shift.

On the way to work, it dawns on me that I’m starting to hurt a bit and I decide to call and get a doctor’s appointment right away. Strangely enough, when I get there, he makes me do all these tests, walk across the room, walk across the room on your toes, stand on your heels (shit, I can’t do this normally, let alone now — although I could stand on tiptoe with my right foot, I couldn’t with the left one). No x-rays, but tells me to take some Motrin OTC and gives me a wrap, one for my left ankle and one for my right knee, which has really taken a shot.

Fortunately, because I’ve been running back and forth to the hospital, I’ve got spare changes of clothes, food (instant oatmeal, soup, etc.), and all kinds of other stuff in my car. Fortunately, I also had a brand new package of pantyhose. Yippee. I put those on at the doctor’s office.

This will slow down my packing, which should be ongoing, since I’m moving the week of Thanksgiving. But we’ll just have to take it a day at a time.

But when I think about it, I realize it could have been SO MUCH WORSE. I could have broken something, my neck even, had spinal cord injury, cracked my head open, etc. That’s why I can’t complain too loudly. I got off pretty easy considering. Even Robert said I was lucky. He observed that I could have ended up in the next bed, learning to push a wheelchair by blowing through a straw. Yeep!

Here’s a view of our stairs, so you can see what I saw right before I went stair diving. If you look closely, you can see my blue 300ZX parked to the left of the stairs. The ground clearance on the Z is five inches. That was one reason for the difficulty getting in and out of the car in my crippled state!


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